I was not involved in the making of this story.
Every year I give my friend and fellow Rotarian a gallon of caramel corn he gives me his famous peanut brittle. It’s not too sweet and and it won’t break your teeth as most brittle does.
So I brought home the candy on Wednesday, sampled a small amount, and handed the bag over to Gary as I do every year.
We talked for awhile and then got ready to run some errands before I went to a book signing.
I cam home around 9:00 that evening and the trash can was locked. Gary had chicken for dinner and I figured maybe there were bones and he didn’t want my chicken loving dog to rummage in the trash for them.
I asked Gary why and he got this sheepish look on his face.
“Uh, we forgot to move the candy.”
“Excuse me? Every year I give you the candy and never eat another piece. You put it on the table up high or in a drawer. So how did WE forget to do that?”
“Well, we were rushing….”
“No, we sat and had a conversation. There was no rushing and it was your job to move it. How much did he eat?”
“All of it.”
Now we’re talking at least a pound of peanut brittle. I look up the toxicity of peanuts and we’re okay there. He didn’t break any teeth, thank goodness Jim makes the perfect brittle, and so the big deal is all the sugar.
I kept waiting for him to get up in the middle of the night when it was snowing to go outside. Trust me, Gary was taking him, not me. But he didn’t ask.
Gary took him out yesterday and announced the appearance of perfect poop. Yesterday he acted normal and then last night, of course as his rear was facing my face, came the gas. The most noxious gas a medium dog could ever produce. It kept coming and Gary kept laughing.
This morning’s walk produced perfect poop.
I guess WE dodged a bullet.
Next year I will be keeping all of the peanut brittle.
I am double and triple warning Gary to move all the food and goodies up higher than you think is warranted.
At least he didn’t eat the cellophane bag or the zip tie.
